If it's magic (make it everlasting) - Sergio Jeans

Creative Writing Awards 2024: Poetry Runner Up


Title: If it’s magic (make it everlasting)


i want to ask you so much 

i have so many things to say to you 

i have so many questions for you 

have you ever lost faith in yourself 

does the chosen one have doubts 

does his holiness have a bad hair day 

can a deity ever falter 

can someone with thousands of children keep track of and care for them all 

what is free will 

and do we have it for real ? 

or is the free will of one 

distilled among the rest 

and we swallow it in the morning 

with the rest of our meds 

blue or red 

we’ll never know 

right or wrong 

we’ll never know 

but everyone tells me that You know. 

you the almighty 

you the all powerful 

i do believe in you 

do you believe in me?


i wish you would stop leaving me on read 


actin like you’re better than me. 


you’ve got such a superiority complex 


and everybody’s feeding into it. 


you created a list of words 


and nailed a man to wood


because of their meaning 


a meaning you created 


we are all what you created 


and so we can be more 


it can all be more 


there will always be more 


but what if what we need 


is less ? 


what if we don’t need the meds 


blue or red ? 


what if nothing’s wrong or right 


wasn’t it fine for adam and eve to just exist ? 


can it really be true that a piece of fruit caused all this ? 


and what if Jesus was the first minstrel


asked to put on a show for the white man 


only to be gentrified in history 


and denied the respect of his own word. 


word changed into versions by other white men –  


don’t you too want to read 


the uncensored version of what he said ? 


and what if Jesus was the first piece 


of strange fruit that grew and hung 


from a poplar tree


what if the wood he was nailed to 


was made from one? 


is it so different to die 


by a crown of thorns 


than by a gun ? 


but there are no hashtags for Jesus Christ 


no chants to say his name, 


for we mainly say it in vain.


and what if i felt him in church today 


how do i trust him to take this pain away? 


how do i know when to pray 


or even what to say. 


“hi God” “hey Jesus” “what’s up my guy” 


“how was your day” 


can i ask why mine was bad 


or can i still not know yet 


you confuse me the two of you 


and i call to mother mary too 


becauyse what i believe is that 


someone has to know 


i believe there is a reason 


(most days)


but my faith comes in seasons 


(and waves) 


please help me make it last 


and help me believe it’ll stay.

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