Eleven People - Skye Berggren

Creative Writing Awards 2024: ScreenWriting Runner Up

ACT ONE

INT. “LUCKY 7’S” BODEGA – AFTERNOON
A brief, uncomfortable look around the bodega. The camera cuts to various angles, showing off the dirty walls, the half empty shelves, the freezer where ice-cream has melted and refrozen, coating half the shelves in sticky white ice. The silence is loud. Florescent overhead lights flicker and hum, bugs caught in the glass. The freezer whose door doesn’t fully close rumbles and dings, frosty air oozing out the bottom. Dirty brown water drips onto chip bags, crinkling the over-inflated bag. EIGHT, 22 male, unshaved & wearing a bowling shirt, sits behind the counter, tossing chips into his mouth. Leaning on the counter in front of him is his friend, ONE, 22 male, skinny and disheveled.

INSERT CLOSE UP of ONE’s phone, where he scrolls through NINE’s instagram (21 female, brunette, always wearing pair of tall lace up doc-martens). He’s scrolling up, nearing the end of a depressing trip down memory lane, closing in on the present. We see his face, the blue glow of the phone illuminating it against the harsh backlight of pale green. He scrolls a little further, stopping halfway up a picture. We see the bottom half of a wedding photo, a white dress disjointed by black military boots, a black suit disjointed by blinding white sneakers faintly stained yellow. Cut back to ONE’s face, only now we see the front door floating between his arms, separating him from his phone. He turns it off, face suddenly cast into grim shadow. Shapes begin to manifest in the cloudy glass of the door, the dim light of late afternoon casting blurry shadows.

The door dings as two people enter. The first is ELEVEN, 18 male, tall but twinkish, followed by SEVEN, 17 female, only slightly shorted than ELEVEN, dressed mannishly with a serious disposition.

ELEVEN

-they do it in the book, my cousin
Nine did it when she was my age, I
just don’t get the big deal!

SEVEN

If you actually read the book you
would know that its framing it as a
bad thing. It’s called subtext.

ELEVEN
(He says each
syllable slowly,
emphasizing each
sound)
Its GENRE.

ELEVEN (cont’d)

It doesn’t matter if its good or bad,
the story is build on tropes, and the
tropes are popular for a reason!

SEVEN

Popular doesn’t mean good.

ELEVEN, clearly uncomfortable with the conversation, starts shopping idly. He has doubt’s, and he’s angry at SEVEN for voicing those doubts.

ELEVEN
…it’s legal.
SEVEN
Tell that to Nine.

EIGHT perks up hearing NINE’s name. He recognizes the kids, waving at them with his chip bag, chips falling out as he does, scattering onto ONE’s hair. He chaf’s, scowling and brushing them off.

EIGHT

Oh hey guys! I didn’t hear you come in.

ONE

Thats because you have chip in your ear.

EIGHT
Lighten up man.
ONE

No really, theres half a chip in your left ear.

EIGHT

Oh yo.

SEVEN and ELEVEN walk up to the counter. One stops brooding to talk with the two as EIGHT picks chip out of his ear.

ONE
what’cha up to.

SEVEN

I was telling El-
ELEVEN

We’re talking about “love Modérn”

ONE

Ugh, I hated that book. The
characters were all cardboard
cutouts. Eight, you remember the
popcorn reading? We all kept getting
confused who was who.
EIGHT

Y’all in Grants class? He was chill.

SEVEN
(annoyed at having
the conversation
taken away)

Yeah. We have an essay analysis due
on monday. It’s our “final” before Christmas break.

ONE

El, aren’t you moving this christmas?

ELEVEN

After christmas, but, yeah.

EIGHT
Wheres lil Six?

on queue, SIX, 16 trans-man, bounces through the door. He is short, with long curly hair and a comically large backpack. SEVEN softens immediately upon seeing him, then darkens when SIX runs up to ELEVEN for a kiss.

ELEVEN
You finish your reading?

SIX

Yup! It was great, I totally loved
the way the romance plot developed,
it really fit the genre.

ELEVEN gives SEVEN a smirk, she returns it with a glower.

EIGHT
(to one)
Ugh, wait, I remember this book now. The authors voice was gnarly annoying man. Can’t stand accents in dialogue.

SIX
(to el)
You said you wanted to ask me
something?

ELEVEN
(looking at seven)
Not here.

SIX and SEVEN make eye contact. SEVEN blushes, still
frowning, and looks away.
ONE checks his phone again.

ONE

Where is Four? She was suppose to be
down like half an hour ago.

ONE walks to the back of the counter and lets himself into the-
BACKROOM

He walks to a door on the back wall and knocks.
Beat.
He knocks again.
This time, the sound of cans clattering comes from the other side, along with grumbling. The door creeks open a crack. TEN, 29 but looking 50, peers through the small crack, the chain still in place.

TEN
Whuh- oh, its you.
ONE

Hi Ten. (one looks over Tens head
easily, and notices the empty beer
cans.) You uh, still goin to those
meetings?

TEN

Shaddup. I don’t need lecturing from
my stupid brothers kid.

ONE

Did you read that book he asked me to
give you?

TEN
(starting to retreat)
Whatever…gave up halfway…pacing’s
shit.

ONE puts his foot in the door before it closes again.

ONE

Is Four home? We were suppose to take the kiddos on that campus tour today. TEN growls, but leaves the door open and starts walking upstairs.

TEN

Yeah yeah, I’ll get her.

STOREFRONT
ELEVEN and EIGHT are goofing off, EIGHT trying to throw chips into ELEVENS mouth now. ELEVEN clearly admires EIGHT, and is a little to excited to hang out with him. SEVEN and SIX stand next to each other a pace away.

SEVEN
(blushing, not making
eye contact)

Heyuh, six?
SIX
(smiling)
Yeah? Whats up!

(Beat.)

SEVEN
You and I have been friends since
elementary school you know, and next
semester will be my last year at the
highschool. I was wonder…

SIX
(head tilted)
yeah?

SEVEN

I, uh…wanted to tell you…that I
think you…

Six is making deep eye contact with Seven, willing her to say something. Just as she is about to say something, the door dings again as two people enter. THREE, 24 male, wearing a polo shirt tucked into slacks, and TWO, 24 male, ripped jeans and messy hair.

TWO

-I’m so much more than just a drawer,
Three, I’m a visual storyteller! I’m
exploring the language of body and
movement and capturing it on the
paper! You always talk about how your
job is all conflict and tension and
how those are these like super deep themes in the world, well I’m-
THREE

-failing highschool algebra…
again…for the sixth time…

TWO grabs a few items and walks between Six and Seven, splitting them up. Two and three continue to talk idly, unaware that there is a large group of friends that they’re standing in the middle of. They check out and leave.

SIX
(blushing slightly)
Um. You were gonna say something?
About me?

SEVEN

Oh! Right. Yeah. I was saying um, I think you…should join me at OSU! Yeah! We can be roomies, or, you know, we don’t have to be, I mean-

SIX

(chuckling)

Well, of course I’m going to OSU! I could never leave my right hand man.


SIX gives SEVEN an affectionate punch on the arm. SEVEN smiles painfully.

BACKROOM
Sounds of steps come down from the open door. The bolt unlocks and FOUR is standing before ONE. FOUR, 21 female, has a tight pony tail, and is a few feet shorter than ONE. By the way the two act though, she may as well be the same height.

FOUR

Hey One! Ten said you needed
something?
ONE

Um. It’s Thursday. We agreed to take
cuz and their friends on a tour of campus, remember?

FOUR looks puzzled for a sec, then her eyes go wide.

FOUR

Oh. Oh gosh, is it really already
Thursday? I told- um, sorry, I dont think I can come.

ONE
Whats up?

FOUR

Im expecting- they’re back in town
and- Oh! I have your book!

ONE

What?

FOUR

Yeah, I knew my stupid step-dad wouldn’t read it, so I did. He wasn’t wrong though, the pacing is really bad, theres like no character development.
ONE

Um. Okay. Are you alright?

FOUR
(obviously nervous)
What? Yeah, of course! Totally! You
should really go though, don’t wanna make the kids wait- In the storefront, the front door dings.

FOUR (cont’d)
(rushing)
Actually I will come why don’t you go
out the back and I’ll grab the kids and-

ONE, perturbed by Four’s behavior, takes a step back and peeps into the Storefront. Four cringes as ONE looks out. Two people have entered, standing awkwardly in the door. The camera pans up from a pair of white sneakers and combat boots. FIVE, 20 years old, dark hair and a dark expression, stands next to NINE.


STOREFRONT
Eleven waves at Nine. Six smiles widely and runs to give Nine a hug.

SIX
NINE!!!!!!

ELEVEN

Oh, hey cus. Did your plane just
land?

NINE

Yeah, it did, we were just on our way
to your parents place. Hey Eight,
still running your dad’s shop?

EIGHT
(under his breath)
Still running away with douchebags.

SEVEN
(following after six,
like he’s a magnet)

Hey Nine. Maybe you can settle an
Argument between me and your cousin. You read Love Modérne in high school, right?

FIVE
(looking around the
shop disapprovingly,
avoiding eye contact.)

Ugh, awful book.


NINE

Oh you’re just biased. I’ve been
trying to get him to read a book with a romance subplot for years. Love Modérne was fun though, really interesting structure.


SEVEN

You agree that the relationship is meant to be toxic, right? Like obviously they end up together because its romance but the structure and subtext clearly imply that…uh Seven trails off as she notices Nine not paying attention, staring directly over her head. She follows Nines gaze to see One and Four standing in the back, Four shyly hiding behind One.

ONE

Hey Nine. Long time no see.

Five finally stops scanning and locks onto One, grimacing.

NINE
(whistfully, maybe in
shock)
Hi One.

Theres a moment of complete silence, the tension across the room thick.

ONE

Sorry I missed the wedding. Judging by the pictures, my plans for it went well. Beautiful.
FIVE
They did. Thanks.

Five’s jaw is tense, but One and Nine are only looking at each other.

NINE
(quietly)
Sorry you couldn’t see it for yourself. It was really magical. I wish you’d been there.


ONE
I’m sure…

No one says anything, Six slowly goes towards Eleven for safety, leaving Seven stranded. Eleven clears his throat.

ELEVEN

Hey uh, One. You still gonna give us that tour…or did you want a raincheck.


NINE

If you’re free, we should really get din-


ONE

-no, Eleven, I don’t need a raincheck. Let’s go.

One marches past Four, who looks up with surprise. He crashes through the back door, with Eleven, Six, and finally Seven following awkwardly after.

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